Tell it Like it is

Last Saturday night I went to Microsoft's holiday party. There weren't as many Bill Gates-types as I anticipated (I only saw one, really). The space was too big for the crowd but the food was delicious and they had really fun stuff to do: foozball, oragami (with an instructor, otherwise...?), henna, temporary tattoos, chocolate sampling and la piece de resistence... having your tea leaves read!

So WR and I waited and waited and waited to get our tea leaves read. Now, WR has always had problems with her ankles, so even if she dolls up she always wears comfortable shoes. Unlike Gertie. Gertie, who had lived in France a while, somehow got brainwashed that a true lady wears 3" heels until she is 68, then she moves down to the 2's. By the time it was my turn, I wasn't really into it anymore.

I was asked to hold the tea cup, close my eyes and think of three things I wanted to know. Duh, who doesn't put down that they want to guage their wealth, love life and health? I already suspect a scam, but it's free so I guess it can't be a scam, and even if it is a scam at least Microsoft is the one paying for it. Wait, did I just ruin my three questions now? Turn the cup three times. Give it back.

The woman with long wavy hair down past her patoushki tossed the tea in an OXO bowl and started to examine the remaining leaves.

"Do you have siblings?"
"Yes, an older brother." She stares curiously into the cup.
"I see you as being very independent as a child. I see tomboy. Were you a tomboy?"
"Yes!" This was maybe not a scam after all.
More curious staring into the cup.
"I see a rift with your mother."
"Uh. In the past? No." Scam.
"Really? I see that you challenged her, but that could mean mentally, like she couldn't keep up with your youthful brain, or that you were rebellious."
I'm perplexed. I was the farthest thing from rebellious as a child. I was 10 minutes past curfew once. Since I think this is a scam, I don't respond because I don't want to give her hints on where to take this. Gertie can be a b*tch sometimes.

I don't remember where she went from there. At some point she asked me if my ex-boyfriend wasn't able to commit. I said, yes, that was the problem although in reality my last beau and I mutually realized we weren't a good fit. There was a lot more curiously staring into the cup, some talk about my past life in a snowy place where my husband worked in the train yard and I journaled about my [ed insert: miserable] life. She said I was good at writing and I liked it, but I'm not sure if she meant now or back then when I was that woman. And then this:

Sudden shock upon looking even deeper into the leaves.
"Is there a child in your household?"
"No."
"Hmm. Someone watches too much TV."

Busted.

WR had a totally different experience. Her tea reader asked her upfront what she wanted to know about, and desparately seeking love, WR asked where the hell was her man. The woman said that probably WR's head was ready for love but her heart was not. I don't think WR liked this answer at all. Then the woman read WR's face, and they stopped looking into the cup and discussed personal paths and psychotherapy, and WR walked away with the contact info of a "good" therapist. Now, WR is one of the sweetest girls on the west coast, but I have always thought she is a little lost. Apparantly so much so that one doesn't need to take a look at the bottom of a teacup to know it.